About Will

do I want to do it at all is the question I want to have fun like Robert Altman in "Prêt-à-Porter" another Kansas City boy talent like that outrageously full of themselves takes dozens hundreds I'm one reading "Speer The Final Verdict" thinking about will

Saks Pajamas

fear of clarity everything turning into cliché callow shallow water none taken in this is the way it feels cheap Zinfandel suits me say what you will in Saks pajamas I feel like a king in exile in a Swiss hotel no smart-alecky remarks wan self-referential wit flip incoherent dialogue sincerity sine qua non

Past Moot

puzzle calms meeting madness trees trash car revision lightens pretentious obscurity cyc handy actress vacations with husband friends meet for movie rainbow cheers large leaf infested aphids final verdict renders past moot

Go Looking

across the country father and son on the 25th floor the elevator is the size of a small fireplace unthinkable my hips up there a community college rooms crowded with vapidly cheery young people milling we find the woman she shows us our rooms windowless plywood cubicles too small for a bed you are a very stupid administrator I must have a room at least as large as yours with a window to the outside go looking a section for animals strange white wax knobs sheep suggestion of vile experiments outside with a techie kid I am always writing hide small tape recorders here and there playing tapes in my shoulder bag a paper with various notes one in someone else's handwriting big disks masters of classical repertory a turntable playing would destroy them they are already warped put them back in their sleeves I like this one he says a poem back to the west

Unified Creation

insecure I give away pieces to others then don't like what they do I never learn better off doing it myself know what I have in mind unified creation rolling summer cool up here Maine like Minnesota Adirondacks escape Missouri humid heat ideal vacation for a lucky kid hot afternoon windy "Part of the charm that the Keith brothers had for Frederick was that they were honest-to-God gentlemen who could be treated as equals without becoming uppish and could be counted on not to have hurt feelings or to suffer ill-concealed agonies of jealousy." (Nancy Mitford, "Frederick the Great")

Poor You

when picking roses expect to be pricked don't complain it's part of the bargain or do without poor you such a drab life

On Stage

no surprises more even jumping rut I know how to plan gaily daring fate will get me prostate joints teeth lung stones how bad can be some shocks otherwise I've been where I'm going work yields progress all characters unmoored except by circumstance yet someone is there in each being actual possible dreamed expiring on stage to validate our parking

Sitting Down

the art of sitting down more often Beatles go further tomorrow no Tom nice try confidence something will happen who what perfect release party nature smiling poets enjoyed each other my pleasure hosting shyly missed moment tout Fast Books hanging out recurs friends warm day special legs made it dream Sam chance visit curious house wake ache chilly

Old Friends

there they are my old friends from the Living Theatre 1966 the whole company (except Judith) in Bertolucci's "Agonia" what a surprise to find them still existing on the little screen embodying the time impeccably sincere any irony was mine Julian dying all uncredited how fond I am of their memory

Checking In

widespread allergies extravaganza another worst year ever reportedly fun drumming djembe African two bell tam conga Shiva drum wailed Maine wedding August scrambles conjugal visit Santa Barbara can't miss each other night comfort day passing commenting checking in

Summer Duties

becoming real by attaching persons grass cut screen door perfectly fitted summer duties before solstice drum circle Grange potluck not my scene but I can stay with Mercy rehearse Victoria Hall Paul signed costume characters afloat in space and light introducing Suzy spice bean salad few clothes better let skin breathe

Even Writers

the wrong people suffer doers protect themselves who deserve punishment who are genuine bad guys never artists or musicians actors even writers do no harm maybe bad feelings poor imagination dulling limits untested sympathy too many calls for tears

Only Miracles

practice talking think together ala Bohm Dialogue Friends' active listening easy window washing long handles no ladder salient catfight absent issue beautiful Visages des Enfants innocence unhappy whole village mobilized only miracles can save them and do shabby stable unconditioned survival

One Too

driving socializing poetry music landscape food good conversation with one two three not more I eavesdrop excluded not really yet really apart generational cohistory exercising amid lappers imagining peers I never was more comfortable writerly solitude peering out are you one too

Long Lines

to write long lines Dan Raphael says breathe his gust a torrent of images passions witty formulations deep too unexpectedly terror shadowed rising above beyond more windows spacious largeness encompassing warmth home town leggy girls in leotards out running in the dark successful publisher-writer dinner sisters thrilling conversation nighttime sightseeing Gove County Philharmonic soundtrack I am Michelle Bachelet every contribution helps

Join Me

items no people books narrow argh clean windows help light through eyes water strain see sniffle sneeze orchestra seats metaphor for what music dream millions art employ persuasion fails energy available who will join me have a good time

Armed Men

new black meaning killing themselves goombah planet plague renewal available houses land armed men sinking finale go on be trivial truth be damned many calls zero results welcome busy elsewhere comet dust can I do better keeping at it what else is

Let's Meet

if diligence were all fear failure stopless novel choreography let's meet in real life petals money a tiny leaf return address dates casting travel effortless guacamole grass grows art too moves calls hoping imagined action who trust script one other

Lose Again

get out of my dreams you're dead it makes me feel bad I wake expect new lose again fail mourning who has time fact past forgetting you live somewhere else all right no doubt existing random love

Vital Food

studio refactored no more excuses distractions cultivated impressions vital food human interaction I was wearing a human skin though you wouldn't know it loose flattering my own lithe form time improved

Too Far

you don't know how far you can go until you go too far something will turn up you will do what you do whatever anyone says write every day even the little I produce is too much to read no market existing making play

Do More

edenic housekeeping could consume our meditation maximizing natural advantages we flatter ourselves digester bacteria gasping we register sewage smell smile anyway new floor hardening mellowing Bach watch tennis bicycle post office mow move summer furniture sweep watch opening Tarkovsy "Sacrifice" Jack Kornfield Buddha thought demands rigorous rethink fuzzy president fantasy go further do more

Candle Lit

knowing optimism bias how dare do anything still doing proceeds studio floored play barreling down matches played heedless professional obliging once foreground resolves what am I really doing what are you is anyone or is it background I am a character in my own movie set candle lit zoning threat recedes raspberry acres across the street not becoming factory some change due neighbors dying to sell too bad deer did in raspberries

Waist High

French Open floor weather video ranges "The End of the Affair" "Dersu Uzala" we can't complain peonies strawberries gold finches lupin waist high displaying form quick lines dip air descenders ascenders capitals for sentences names vary texture book piles move somewhere else equally

Oddly Soft

round over till it breaks tractor overheats tuner loses channel breaks up smoothly anticipate air kiss mutual appreciate exemplifies good will this week cork work dominates slowly fill my corner oddly soft

Tail Feathers

pie master next door good friends help me do what health mobility Netflix mowing yard sale season that too doom consensus not a radical accidental adventitious fortuitous obvious bloody rot a snipe tail feathers warble night gradually engulfs our faltering commitment ripening compost

Say Hello

iris ink attacks antique green water awaits a.m. supplements adjust well art excuses carrying on like Bresson "Dames" or we know each other too well to say hello perhaps