Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Too Late

close foreign bases bring forces home reprogram only rationale is keeping order but it doesn't work we make things worse we could learn from history military no answer but no we go through it again hard to be exactly happy going into this new year so much is wrong so little changing still hopeful Obama will find the courage to turn it all around elder less personal at stake concerned the world goes on unlike each bye-bye after care no more stop waste millions out of work hungry stop wars more unemployed can't stop it's keeping us alive warm fed moving barely half awake is it too late

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Heavy Boxes

what did I say let them babble on what do I care truly all I want is to do my thing what little energy I have left allows me organize heavy boxes defy gluing music Frederic Rzewski respectable density swings both ways meanwhile machines do everything

The Others

not this or that but this and that and the others too

Monday, December 29, 2008

Big Boost

the composition should always get more concise said Bernhard and I agree too much to read so keep it short get to the point which still may be itself elaboration like music expectation tricks with brain cells directly stimulated pleasuring poor eyes so many pages to scan close packed lines like heavy luggage light travel goes as far more easily avoids tiresome waiting lugs even wheeled aisle narrows big boost will one really need cowboy boots in India could have thought

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Real Freedom

poems banners festival planning like "invisible tears of lost self" if what is said is not true what then guides the good man's decisions all gone wrong who can be joyful only protected children like boy sopranos glorious while it lasts who tells what real freedom is

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Who Knew

power out four days imagine circumstantial transformation technology collapse inevitable nobody quite ready whatever happened to normal life who knew repairmen heroic can't keep up worse storm coming

Friday, December 26, 2008

Purer Path

subtle simple being thought embodied unapologetic unexplained dramaticized harmonic resolution dozens of players as one shining shimmering colossalismo even so glimpses of a purer path arise new year century president self undone relation original language as if wording unspoken definition always having way

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Interesting Lives

Christmas without baby Jesus children not so bad nobody but ourselves a few presents our usual happy consolations class is taste honor preferable to glory even interesting lives end Harold Pinter Eartha Kitt remembered a little longer form trivializes virus weak exhausted I am strong practiced tai chi learning swims await return of ordinary time

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Surface Tension

Promise or threat? Train whistle occasional, country road highway various volume roaring of somewhere else, the possibility of going, the threat of being taken away, or abandoned. Cars in the driveway say the same thing all the time. If one of them is gone, we are apart, which is fine until night falls and the house is half-empty, one of us here, the other not. Drawn to freedom and newness, appalled at the possibility. If this is not everything, I am radically incomplete, trapped in surface tension above an unknowable ocean. If I go somewhere else I am neither here nor there. Elsewhere I am no one; at home I am a fraction of myself. The only unity is to have nothing, a few rags, a bowl.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Too Sincere

slippery bags of raw meat imagine what community grill implies voting Sparrow "Mrs. Palfrey" too sincere unconvincing good intentions oddly hypnotic anyway like spinning violin affirming Christmas goodbye snow rain coming ruins effect perfect the way it is personal worldview conditioned luck blessings undeserved

Monday, December 22, 2008

Animated Air

snowed in chains required not on of course I can I have to want to go somewhere badly enough like swimming are they open I'll call everything else can wait staying home especially delicious I love the light the quiet animated air

Iced Over

tripped over the dog froze iced over slept through die final different story ended fresh energy climb Andes ancient carved spectacle beyond seasonal histories easy fun heart expanding temperature transformed unique animal continuity

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Bending Over

longest night relief coming our way ice falling eucalyptus bending over rain falling freezing fire festival off Morocco finished rejoin Montaigne pleasantest of personalities my tree lights on till day lengthening happy my dread is gone the night no longer frightens me I drift around warming the various rooms absorbing stories words images music play with light ideas anticipate cycle nothing less awful burning imagination for luck

Saturday, December 20, 2008

Lighting Up

residual fauna like Disney collectibles lighting up and playing music Swedish meatballs seven-layer dip saucy shrimps certainly alive only partially transformed drive slowly on snow speaking of theatre fascinated baby see me peel a tangerine

Friday, December 19, 2008

All Sides

will will power make room for art the character question poses itself thin or round seduction by success unequal dangers threaten all sides head heart holding hands balances my always dear concern for my own protection giving everything I have

Thursday, December 18, 2008

My Army

where is my army of servants maids cleaners housekeepers valets chauffeurs dishwashers tuners grooms lackeys butlers laundresses financial advisors trainers secretaries assistants filing clerks masseurs barbers manicurists polishing windows why do I have to do everything myself (except the gardening)

What Is

Beethoven apposite again funny good art rotating ever renewed project push completed clears Christmas wondering what now email clearage reveals lost gems heartbreak distance from friends accepting limits of here harder still what is rich past expression by the time you know how to live it is almost too late so hurry up

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Shining Winter

closing cheery snowy swimming positive filing baby singing play delicious cherries frozen chains particular sons hiking rain Peru continues action Santa Barbara spinal adjustments careful walk smiling phoning shining winter

Monday, December 15, 2008

True Speaking

out of what the soul has given him the poet makes the work suspended harmony silent mind explosion each moment passing worth regret no sin true speaking honestly amuse whatever is not written down does not exist if it doesn't make the news it didn't happen example what you or I did yesterday spoke played "worked" felt every possible passion

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Simple Thinking

close call clipping the curb at speed on the Sawmill anything can happen but usually doesn't don't count on it be mindful always every step potential disaster months in a nursing home similarly free cares rinsed away in freshets similarly threaten flooding ten feet deep simple thinking reveals mistakes too late drive slower pay attention be a little safe

Friday, December 12, 2008

Future Blank

Freddie invoked again a flurry of names nothing to do about lost friends missed opportunities for closer further amours sweet pain remains forever yet we must go on centripetal spinning apart timed out and doing other things the present emotions never completely expressed developed resolved linger seductively indulged protest against future blank

Thursday, December 11, 2008

What It Is

a craving for cinnamon got it all cravings gratified cinnamon toast cold milk the body still capable of pleasure glaciers pushing the ice shelves out to sea brrr just thinking about it something other than stanzas are Italian rooms sad Nissan stories something other than line spaces hard to draw with regular lines that's what it is

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Heavy Enough

the play takes everything I have or had plenty more where did it go creeping sleepyness the price of getting up early squeeze it in true the shape counts more than form itself speaking in my head I can begin but don't dare think clearly lightweight heavy enough

A Beautiful Novel

formal adjective white soft condign smooth Bob Heide a rush of affection leaving this place where I felt at home forever two tall handsome young men one fair one dark announce they look alike I hadn't realized they could be twins an elegant gabardine drape unusually cut overflowing friendly warmth as if my life is a beautiful novel

Monday, December 08, 2008

Open Hearts

good nature band people herded each counts noodles hoping stay together I'm not the only once who's lost keep trying room in the noise for chaos precision is better in surgery Mimi contends just fine what other fun days flowing naturally dotted with doings centered on writing being home read films "Rosenstrasse" brilliant but opaque not being German or Jewish Moroccan Tibetan or Czech where would I go if I were going some where warm fragrant colorful markets mellow cafes friendly artists open hearts Kerala stands out viewing moonstones teenage dance class delirious amazed

Sunday, December 07, 2008

All This

Morocco history illuminates endless conflict structural heads cut off palaces leveled political maneuvering armies torture where have I heard all this before meanwhile lives beauty art holy ecstasy love children weaving houses horses food as if this isn't enough

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Using Fingers

keeping on step backward into water diving gets it over faster better watch icy driveway falling danger careful needed special gloves one warm hand enough to comfort another feathered wool synthetic answer if leaning touch anything typing driving using fingers ideas arise naked even winter shorter light at different angles temperatures rise then dissipate leave marks exuberant creation

Friday, December 05, 2008

Four Hours

so much going on it cancels out I wish I could sit still and read I do not much of anything but all I can four hours restaurant work too much standing numb after nap only piano playing possible

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Inner Quiver

tremble no earthquake inner quiver ever present company unreachable horizontal suggest disintegrating heartbeat tempo obvious at the time to survive tomorrow gave myself a laugh encouraging moves temper seasonal droop inevitable shots confirms positive practice free hospital waits warm light on nurses wide awake

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Keep Dancing

routine frames unexpected variation calm enables intense reception open to something arises home date Fitts fish piano challenge further writing Roethke trumps notey Mendelssohn shames my clumsy snaps unworded house card career played for keep dancing believes in actual existence

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Another Day

intermittent constancy affirms classical beauty intelligence harmony formal grace dynamic asymmetry assures continuity cycle beyond going on giving tender appreciation welcome touch gentle strong slow fast virtuosity like staying home granola phoning another day