Unexpected Results

the lesson is the living
forms risen from mind
all failed faith forgiven
blameless into the void

wisdom is not knowing
better how to be bad if
one came another two
excused the sameness

willingness is the right
answer if asked say no
unless you want to yes
joy unexpected results

Meaning Well

if enough is not enough what is
the point of going on intuition
is not infallible nothing can be
the answer following a question
of behavior weakly described as
well may be told over the outer
defense wall breached by cold
as if the climate were a friend
meaning well at least at first

Not Complaining

not to dwindle I am going
strong the time will come
when faculties fail to fade
away friends till then I'm
not complaining

Two Breakfasts

quietly faint motel living I'd
wanted to ask about criminal
distress before limited vision

I didn't mean you or me we
both meant something else
ticket prices what they are

as photo research occurs be
safe divided courage roads
dark busy confusion passes

now we are here going crazy
enough for two breakfasts one
flying all the way southeast

Stay In

the seasons change to keep us happy
on our toes if nothing changed then
neither would we imagining equatorial
ennui chills despite the welcome warmth

weather changes to amuse us what now
what inconvenient resistance to all our
tidy plans when it's beautiful I have to
go outside glad when it rains stay in

Too Soon

what you would say
or will when you do
precedes but doesn't
satisfy the actuality

another person then
is there and speaks
his or her part can't
know it in advance

there is no point in
thinking ahead you
say but can't help it
thought spins away

quietly pay no mind
breathe consciously
relax it doesn't help
to be there too soon

Real Time

Herman's Hermits Longfellow Vermont
Szymborska old friends newer friends
poetry Whitman real time passing by
notifications pending "Chain" Jimmy
Mark Sinking Bears book of collage
potato salad miners' lettuce rhodies
a swim a nap dreams Haydn blooms

All Gone

remember imagine make up is there any difference
we extrapolate our stories from what little we know
how it must have happened how could we have been
stupid unkind blind to others' suffering and courage
whitewash our own culpabilities justify our errors
as if victimized if we didn't know better at the time

I remember myself remembering reminded by image
lost when Mother lost home movies in one of many
moves at will (Dad's not hers) as if they would always
exist only in my mind does anything of that remain
living his Buick her grace and charm my little suit
and Eton cap setting out for Sunday school all gone

Never Healed

declare futility come home do no more
harm if they harm themselves too bad
we have demonstrated our inability to
help however hard we try lives spend
the lives of cheaters and profiteers are
ruined too once corrupted never pure
break hearts with pity for never healed
losses home loved ones ancient ways
never as good again no taking it back

Fine Footprints

if I could see I'd say snow
separate flashes solid rain
that the new rock on baby

I said I saw some snow I
walk first fine footprints
home puzzle steady work

you saw what I see so I
naturally imagine same
sense impress our mind

we know see each other
better real than memory
proximate wishing well

More Time

homework late deskwork overdue I'm
not ready can I postpone it would be
better if I had more time be prepared

there is always something to be sorry
about decisions that might have gone
the other way if I could think clearly

I do the best I can it all works out in
the long run win lose problems solve
themselves something else happens

Just Nuts

we told the preacher what we wanted
he saw another truth discounted facts
drew strange conclusions what makes
me think I'm right except I know I am

reasoning comes after the decision not
before you knew what you wanted to do
he couldn't know me didn't understand
nor I him but it isn't even he's just nuts

Ancient Trail

the road describes the landscape murmurs
to the creek you cross in a secret language
you will never understand until you notate
every feature rise descent to valley floor
here curve here drive fast toward home

as if it is incidental music accompanies
the moving line responds to natural and
human pressures bends when it must
remembers its direction ancient trail
for American family visit even now

Made Up

you said it he said
I said so what
he said if you think so
ask me anything
who are you I said
no answer
I didn't mean it he said
I said I didn't either
so we kissed and made up

Earlier Stories

if no one remembers it doesn't
happen then afterwards did it
or not if we thought we would
then forgot before there could
be anything worth remembering

if no one remembers it must not
have meant anything though it
did at the time people doing it
were real and cared or were they
if no one remembers they did

no one remembers after a while
everything is forgotten stories
made up from earlier stories the
truth is some things matter a lot
real if not forever at least now

Partial Understanding

forget perfect form the youngest
fantasy expired with the study
times be grateful you can walk
to the store bring home bacon
butter chocolate ice cream this

perfection dimpled simpering
forgotten anxiety self aware
that time rumbles ever forward
march in sync or be crushed
greater forces play at solitaire

that sounds too bitter to be
the last word is positivity if
you think so I do perfected
in partial understanding love
harmony rhythm of spheres

Your Fiddle

say what you may the sorry fallen
will not respond they cannot know
the cost of privilege mocks music
as if your fiddle could play itself

finish for the others who remain
uncoupled theirs the woe of wish
tears of sympathy change no aim
when alteration to another comes

Let's Eat

sun appearing going down
snow appearing melting
architects appear considering
what shall we do now

steak appearing thawing
potatoes ready for zapping
horse people braving cold
what shall we do now

words appearing meaning
what else appears uncool
water running slowly warm
what shall we do now

let's eat

Big Events

egad the planning oh all right why
resist nothing happens otherwise

then we are there everybody glad
further gathering already bruited

big events happen suddenly slow
echo years of meaning unknown

poise and equanimity the virtues
cultivated by our happiest farmers

Modest Words

if I don't say so you won't know
anything I think you can guess
not right imagine anyone else

we are formed and so continue
as if free as if deciding what to
do or not making ourselves up

it still is me though cells and
circumstances change I write
recapitulate all my little ways

believe me even when I'm lying
lies reveal more truth behind
the smiles and modest words

On Thinking

the concept is not even conscious
you do what you do invent reasons
for anything at all before or after
couldn't change your mind if you
hadn't made it up in the first place

think for fun not practical purpose
it deepens but does not advance it
shows but does not tell the story
isn't what you think but all that
happens anyway you were there

Hidden Meanings

did you get my message
can I ever know another
voice visage body smile
imagined from the dark
well of being well again

oh yes I have recovered
the viral bounce a week
as usual surprises linger
hidden meanings lying
idling under ugly covers
leading us to wonder why

Perfectly Still

inner reality dark vortex
vibrant energy sink past
stars not always in reach
outside cat skull glowing
the mother's opium there
lie perfectly still and feel

Cruel World

attack by giant liquefied zucchini
do potatoes suffer if so pity them

I only serve a slow sincere movie
warms one of the last cold nights

house always warm or warmable
welcome refuge in a cruel world

attack Iran are we mad addicted
to mayhem can't we have peace

Limited Bounce

done in shockingly wiped
Beethoven too much runs
away flat down on the bed

limited bounce recoveries
renew possible crossword
success love because you

leaves nothing "bricked"
apply brake potion saves
day for night imagining

Anybody Might

I was told otherwise
anybody might think
the same make same
mistakes speak same
nonsense feel same
unavoidable regrets
forgive my unbelief

Necessary Choices

people creepily not like me
other variants less alarming
nothing can be openly said
I understand you but you
don't understand me at all

beyond like or not the gap
widens unbearably I want
to scream flee berate you
for insane ridiculousness
due to necessary choices

definite statements do not
always mean something
viz. democracy not about
fairness but power am I
to agree I can't even listen

Any Action

this is the body reminds itself of time
passing time with random people we
don't express our disagreement don't
expect more than 80-year-old cheer

this body solid not hollow echoing
sensations quiver sneaking inklings
seeing vocabulary from the first cry
proprioceptive feeling barely begun

if I can wait I will know everything
I need you and others for any action
softly measured in German or Italian
my purposes revealed only at the end

Not Well

I can't go on like this I didn't
get my nap sat around reading
about the Singularity while they
worked on my car half an hour
became two and a half I'm not
well I'd better take an aspirin
and lie down yes that's better

What Order

"…future machines will be human, even if they are not biological." (Ray Kurzweil, "The Singularity Is Near")

slo-mo death devalues credit earned wisdom
won will I die before I wear out crash suffer
we all wonder how gracefully get out of here

too complex already grateful for what order
we luckily enjoy others flailing chaos rising
wringing pain suicidal error grotesque ideas

I want to think about beauty love delicious
flavors flaunted happiness spring in train
relieves our little cares embrace our work