Up and Down

flying fingers hit the right notes now soft now loud now shaping phrase the language learned can thus emerge what pleasure play reread Maugham's "The Razor's Edge" untrammeled joy so deft deep art of living civilized wise truth cunning fictional device relax delight in season's pass a morning's work a walk a talk the news goes up and down as if it mattered how leave world

Time Out

time out for a wedding Shannon Mark joyously thoughtfully sincerely united among generations family and friends gladly love praising accepting playing at a beautiful mellow Mendocino ranch idealistic aspirations raise hope future bright imagination everything flowed time out for a road trip together south over mountains fending off distress at vanishing glaciers shrunken lakes hard lives own dears myriad wedding people warm various vital then home via coast serene redwoods ascend Klamath River grand panoramas earth survives us all

Maybe Tomorrow

crisis fiasco meanwhile details tai chi ironing scan honeymoon photograph reglue thunderbird horse arrangements distribute produce meaning not time but being however your cards fall no luck lasts happy never free except today maybe tomorrow

Who Cares

who whom even the Times New Yorker lay lie on everybody's lips Palin's nonstop gonnas unremarked between you and I embarrassing when anybody says it who cares I do stumbles repetitions I mean you know style not content matters most

Hiding Out

keeping busy well not really not directing teaching mentoring being admired who'm I kidding whatever words it wisely expend energy judgment not required odious comparative careerism moves regrets Vermont wherever hiding out chopping mowing manicuring forest few creatures surround remains

Happy Ending

down comforter reset path lights clean furnace filters order propane rainy day season changes real if anything is real easy writing myth follows production bail-out no new deal old rip-off richer protect each other ordinary folk lose not to be cynical Woody Allen bitter seeing what people are forced to do survive support family happy ending

Theatre Fun

disorienting theatre fun with serial murder rocking "Everybody Wants to Kill Someone" small town community playhouse singalong what are they thinking I utterly don't get it what can I offer Beckett Bernhard myself I will think of something but really insults curses "Shut the %#*@ up" again and again poisoned cupcakes caged women ha ha ha

Higher Things

dramatical initiatives not dead yet can be satisfied still more to learn give ask receive transactionalities whether anyone responds another rising twice burned Barcelona the way it has to be for you and me is still romantic colors music rainy symbols wit locations traveling humans yearn for higher things

Even Now

only actual matters "the meaning is in the details" lessons slowly penetrated even now uncertain each moment context measures sliding vowels consonants mix abrasive mellow desperate shock mind habit dubious questioning harder better ideological winner one poem bearable at this time

Good Lighting

silence darkness sudden chill equinox approaching onions garlic tender gum car repaired Rufus Wainwright tai chi slight slump except work going well I like my book finished what shall I do these mysteries require good lighting propose directing one-act comedies stock market falling trips ill advised cut back need no new clothes I have too many pleasures past purchasing

Tennis Fanatic

other possibilities than crickets disguised commodities traders intrude unwillingly entertained as you report the home front sucks I was extremely sleepy all day naming tennis fanatic that doesn't help solve anyone can answer dance I'm evicted how it feels what now what if tree in Traci front seat smells of cigarettes excuse me are we be sheltering a murderer giraffe at the top of the stairs enfeebled what to do the baby may in fact have been rented

Moon Cat

sadness brilliant full moon night soon gone Luna will come again in just four weeks but by then it will be raining overcast chilly still rejoice that the night is ever bright blessing love romance anew mortal white moon cat emerges joining dance gleams below as well don't be sad this transience our happiness

Two Bodies

when did I start holding my own hand last year quite comforting beside my pillow try it you'll see not the same of course but who can stay in contact all the time asks so little giving everything touch fades if you stop moving nerve ends register what's new two bodies confuse each other's thermostats heat up and sweat unless it's cold then thank God for a source of warmth and love

Heading Up

a matter of bubbles forming one last rose the walnut losing leaves Kansas here too an invitation to mild regret as if other's choice could set us free back then repairs would be for good clean barely needed the broom every other Sunday on our own it's all time now stars stop at the bright horizon laughing at ambition limits wonder that anyone can read between lines bothers nags the academic framers speak in Russian only to each other I understand it's late the sun barely glows the body process heading up as if beginning permanently waves goodbye as if knowing it has to be

Move Air

late enough wake up keep it all going part of movie will do the trick ironic sleepytime rumble phoning convenient substitute email rushing tapping kitchen pickup hookup undiscovered country cousins weekend lost power washer rent laugh lines entirely dependent on actors short wise practical windows ventilate few hot days move air before stale future stalls

For Marya

I am exhilarated that you are so busy making teaching presenting inspiring I finally understood what style was too late for myself but never too late masks dances yoga hospitality art is anything that isn't something else my book is finished again now what shall I do while the leaves change

Write On

English subtitles not matching what is being said in English that's very strange and why is Nádas boring us this way art undoubtedly political tragedy understandably crazy-making no one is immune if not that then diabetes could be cancer everything is true so you get to choose what you want to say really it chooses you virtual twins more different than alike so much for nurture if apples reliably complement cheddar closeness comforts thoughts arise bubbles burst I write on

Philosophy in Action

another something emerging synapses click hum hiss wish future improved philosophy in action if it breaks throw it away (recycle?) buy a new one what was valued fixable no more values renewed interest meaning sinful usury whitewashed evil replacement season illusion that cycle revolves what I mean to say what I don't want to believe curmudgeonly buffeted looming walls of water

Ran Off

dream nuts mix a different later long ago as if to mock all my efforts at coherence insight sensible perspective the quiet air the beautiful friendly European youth a closer gurgle in the night I wake at four perfectly composed ready for anything tell me where I went astray misled love muddled lost my own direction ran off looking for underlying nature true self misconstrued cruel history civil failure culture in ruins all marketing and spin losing happiness what mattered most

Changing Weather

inertia repetition vigorous routine missed connections jokes ungotten shows unseen colors may mean opposite moonrise odd noise house creak peepers inside my head inexplicable phenomena not worth talking that's what I said before thinking twice five is fifty-five hardly begins boil berries sugar jars I could be scared and if I were what darkness kisses changing weather whether or not anyone notices I am here

Mine Too

Saturn today because yesterday fried first I know in fact because art party was there as if real markers let swim it's raining in New York quel mess except it isn't four best ready play breakfast as I write heading Queens Hibiscus Jackie reappear in drag it's fate I edit Jimmy's book edit what I do among others peering shoulder crisply quip quick reminder mine too finding voice remember bright idea fun pun excuses any long lapse

Five Times

I do eat granola require cheese prefer berries the usual kitchen melodrama curries ripening tomatoes next door apples crisp tart delicious anybody artist dares to show portraits people we know young friend stands approaches we talk I feel much better stroll inspecting slides high school exciting five times his age formal memories themselves go stiff decay revealed wisdom composed word salad will to nourish

One Other

if not Chopin a kiss or Chopin plus kiss private sleepy ritual it privately enjoyed plan needs vetting decisively poetical arrangement made all present say aye four favor women two display regret one warm remind delivered in haste puzzle by myself imply discomfort paisley on a skirt best in one other

Different Story

two sisters walking down by stream passionate intensity the tennis court toast with honey a dog the night tail wagging we resist I only I back sleep sorry different story replaces reality dreadful politics replaces individual sing while can trees die barns burn bright jovial shaded weeping willow

What It Means

salute moon sliver sailing home what quandary veritably none but accepted contradictions who knew love triangle not resolvable through sex if that was what he was talking about it would be simple biomechanics instead all history is implicated at least that part of what it means all too true all false values bad taste matters less than thought a unicorn in needlepoint a standard pattern based on cloistered tapestry a manuscript drag queens what else the shock wears off pass bar this time wince and play on better make a book than buy one birthday gift

Common Factors

names easily misspelled anything it's a wonder we find each other something distorted world not the way we think existing everything swell interpretations subject to attention gaps flag false understandings derail common factors follow syntax meaning elusive details sharp Jimmy's manuscript in bits arrives a birthday intervenes affection honed by careful practice coming Schubert party contrast practice sleep