Tuesday, October 31, 2017

Die Cast

being is what you are wearing
what you are doing knowing better
who told you to act this way
when was the die cast by whom
and on what ineluctable authority
why is it impossible to escape
you don't want to you are happy
you don't want to do anything else
these are the clothes you have

Monday, October 30, 2017

Nothing Else

how deep in the bed are dreams
found out by the questing body

glimpses only exist sufficiently
to inform inevitable adaptation

separate thoughts flash crossing
tables of play and necessary food

what meant heard in translation
serves when there's nothing else

Sunday, October 29, 2017

Long Lost

looking for the normal that this
is how it is supposed to be it is
reality not some perversion of it

this animal can adapt to clothes
and clocks anything really what
essence remains intact inside it

we are trying to make life good
being sincere and honest loving
each other and our fellow humans

while all this is accidental an odd
accretion of historical errors and
disasters dressed in natural fibers

within we have the usual somatic
fate predating machinery that has
to wear out and be thrown away

or remain and clutter up the land
signifying efforts to bring order
where natural order is long lost

Saturday, October 28, 2017

Aging Out

creative flash jumps out of the chair
like the cat playing hide and seek in
trees aging out dying or flourishing
in the face of drought and cold nights

this is natural he thinks staggering
boldly into the center of the room I
will not get over being old but still
have the sense to move when I can

Friday, October 27, 2017

A Tease

we are still not looking at the sun
glad when it warms us once more

the warmth of the pilot light is too
much I must throw off the covers

I feel I am getting warm but it's
just a tease I am actually losing

Thursday, October 26, 2017

Right Way

not a good idea to act on thought
common sense may kick in later
you think I should have known I
should have thought before acting
but thought may be the problem
feelings are more likely the right
way to go Robin Crusoe realizes

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Here I Am

is this the same me sitting
on my cushion as on the
balcony at the Zen Center
only older though no time
passes as I count breaths
or merely sit and breathe
thinking here I am then
letting the thought fly away

Tuesday, October 24, 2017

Good Intentions

I always think something
will come to me and it
usually does in time for
midnight bedtime tired
and ready to go to sleep

time is as bad as gravity
pulling on memory and
good intentions tied to
earth seasons the body
realizing its continuity

Monday, October 23, 2017

Four Nights

I thought I could be anywhere
it could be anytime then it was
time to pack and drive fly drive
to be back where I started from
as if those three days elsewhere
might not have really happened
though perfectly real at the time
a birthday a staged engagement
all romantically coupled though
three women actually elsewhere
four nights gone entirely enough

Sunday, October 22, 2017

After Croquet

yellow-bellied magpies alert birders
in oaks of Neverland where Russian
fans mourn the doubly dead security
still on salary despite the closed road

that was after croquet and a picnic
before stupendous revolving dinner
round a perfect family weekend to
celebrate life dog child a marriage

Saturday, October 21, 2017

The Whole Story

if I could sit still
I would lie closer to the window
where your breath
fogs my glasses and the words come
easily when I call
all possible answers retreat in doubt
choosing partners
before the rotating beacon returns
rolling in the dust
as if movement were the whole story

Thursday, October 19, 2017

Deep Thinking

out of context nothing
fits my size changing
with the weather deep
thinking is impossible

I go on anyway trying
to live alone one night
used up easily another
recovery close behind

Going Away

looking forward to getting back
the new paradigm of going away
not that I don't want to go indeed
I will be glad to be there with my
precious family enlarged by Bill
intend to have a wonderful time

Wednesday, October 18, 2017

Anxiety

if I don't know where I am
or where you are and don't
have a smart phone what
can I possibly tell Uber

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

Higher Thoughts

I wish I was smarter
and could understand
what's really going on
appreciate sincerity be
ready for what happens
more honest with myself

I wish I felt better could
get up off the floor roll
over in bed swim a few
laps and embrace easily
freely expressing my
deeper higher thoughts

Monday, October 16, 2017

Before Knowing

within reality is the dream
behind understanding the sum
of art before knowing emotion

meaning emerges on its own
strength is continuing to act
beauty is sensing it is there

whether or not you can see
well enough to read or drive
you still can go on looking

Sunday, October 15, 2017

Case Closed

what you say
becomes what was
the case closed
when you write it out

that was a time
of what you would
told again tarnished
by the hopeful air

desirous still
to know the real
impels revision
as fantasy gels

never again to be
paid in cocaine
awake all night
burnishing revelation

now rest beckons
past times past
beyond recovery
enshrined in word

Saturday, October 14, 2017

My Story

pages pile up
as if that means something
I have to do it
even if hardly anyone cares
it's my story
I insist on telling it

Friday, October 13, 2017

Up to You

if you remember better times
you are deluded 'twas always
thus and up to you to see the
beauty and realize the good
unless something bad happens
and all is lost or loved ones
hurt or dead or sick yourself
then it's not your fault and
altogether necessary to be sad

Thursday, October 12, 2017

Above All

feeling better comes from doing
merely being not quite enough
you need exercise and to move
in space talk with other people
then you have a chance to rise
above all terribleness and loss

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Roll Over

nothing matters if you're not alive
what if you're not feeling entirely
well what then what is to be done

and if you wake up weird and can't
roll over can't get up off the floor
who are you now what is to be done

all that matters is what's happening
right here and now you know how
you manage and what is to be done

Always Shining

"I have come to believe that you can escape your demons and still tap the well." (David Byrne)

you may not like it but
the rain refills the well

burning something will
keep you warm in winter

gas is cleaner than wood
or coal and still abundant

the sun is always shining
even when you can't see it

some will freeze or starve
as others bask and thrive

exercising their ingenuity
even the poor can survive

until they become too many
everyone suffers and dies

Monday, October 09, 2017

An Artifact

each intimate observation entails separate
verbalization to become conscious itself
an artifact of conditioning preconception
disguised as spontaneity fooling yourself
first intentions galvanized attention awake
thinking this is groovy without questioning
whose idea it was and where it's taking you

Sunday, October 08, 2017

Still Joy

better maybe is enough to go on
knowing the destination isn't easy
or the path smooth and reliable
still joy arises from hope's ruins
again the pendulum never again

Saturday, October 07, 2017

The True

later I will tell you about today
when nothing else is happening
unless something else comes up

the past keeps on receding faster
so the present can never catch up
as if something new might arise

I am not as clever as I once was
but what remains will have to do
the true still revealing its shades

Friday, October 06, 2017

Cats' Lives

cats like people
are part of your life
then not
not because you leave
or they leave
like people
who may also die
or fade away
cats' lives
are naturally shorter

82

still happy

Wednesday, October 04, 2017

Once Young

nights chillier daybreak later seasons
change and then change back unlike
life remorselessly advancing never
to be the same as we remember once
young not to know that spring again
we count on children for our rebirth
not young themselves so it goes on

Monday, October 02, 2017

One Enough

counting on you still being here
as if the world is solid everything
changes with or without music

only I am always here even when
I'd like a break the you is singular
one enough to authenticate a life

Sunday, October 01, 2017

Good Food

getting to midnight
takes as long as it does
one snack follows another
reading punctuated by cards

it's a little dance I do at night
good food quality writing
if I go to bed any earlier
I wake up at 3 a.m.

Talking to Myself

how can I be kind of I don't see anyone all day
chatting with my chicken doesn't really count
I appreciate her helping me with the weeding
and she's a good listener until she walks away
then I realize I'm essentially talking to myself
as in this poem which doesn't require a reader
although I intend it to be helpful and generous